URBANA – As her junior season wound to an ego-bruising close in 1996, Susanne Land clearly had had her fill of losing.

Pretty much had her fill of collegiate tennis, too.

Days before the start of the Big Ten Championships, Land went to her University of Illinois coach and said, "Go without me."

"That's how low she was," Jennifer Roberts said. "She was ready to give up her scholarship, lay down her rackets."

One year later, Land is still chasing down shots for the Illini, still swinging away and truly enjoying tennis for perhaps the first time since she was a freshman.

"I've had a good year, not from wins and losses, but just from playing tennis," said Land. "I feel a lot better about myself, and I've had a lot more fun."

Don't take that remark about the wins and losses too literally. One year after enduring a disheartening 13-27 singles record, Land is a respectable 18-15.

Furthermore, no Illini has won more Big Ten Conference matches this season (6). Few have been as tenacious as Land, who is 7-4 in three-set matches. And no Illini's been on more of a roll lately, the senior winning four of her last five matches. It would be 5 of 6, but her last match was halted as soon as Wisconsin clinched a 4-0 victory over Illinois in the Big Ten Championships. Land was ahead 6-4, 2-0 at the time.

"Susanne, from a mental standpoint and a physical standpoint, right now is our best player," Roberts said.

Little wonder, then, that Roberts plans to move Land from No. 2 singles to No. 1 when the Illini face Notre Dame today in the NCAA Midwest Regional in South Bend, Ind.

"I was a little surprised," Land said of the switch. "I don't really feel any pressure. I'm just going to play like I normally do. It helps my confidence knowing that she has confidence in me to move me up. I think it's also an opportunity for me to do well at that position."

Ironically, it was at No. 1 singles that Land experienced such a crisis of confidence last season.

Under other circumstances, Roberts would have placed Land lower in the lineup, where her for success certainly would have been enhanced. However, Roberts was caught short on suitable candidates and went with Land as the best available option. The result was a 7-19 record at No. 1, including 3-9 in the Big Ten.

"It really turned into kind of a sacrifice position," Roberts said. "Susanne was just basically struggling, and there was nothing we could do about it. Primarily she struggled because she was put in that position really without the proper foundation."

So Land took her lumps – on the court and to her psyche.

"That's all I kept thinking about was, 'I'm losing, I'm losing, I'm losing, I'm not winning,' " the two-time Tennessee prep doubles champion said. "It took a toll on me. I just got mentally frustrated, and I mentally let down."

Although Land did stick with tennis through the 1996 postseason tournaments, her mental debate about whether to quit continued into the summer. Land kept returning to the fact that her UI career, which had started so promisingly, was unfolding far below her expectations.

"My freshman year, I came in with a lot of goals," said Land, who went 13-11 and recorded nine Big Ten wins that season while playing primarily No. 5. "To get in the NCAAs, to make the Big Ten all-conference team. I came out of that year, and I thought I could achieve those goals."

But Land's sophomore season was a struggle. Elevated to No. 3, she went 14-18. Then came that crushing junior year, followed by long, soul-searching talks with her parents, with Roberts, with UI men's coach Craig Tiley.

What came up time and again, said Land, was her unhappiness about her record. And the feeling that she was letting herself, and others, down.

"I was mainly looking at the win-loss thing and not enjoying just the concept of playing," Land said. "The whole point about why I started playing in the first place was having fun."

"I was too focused on things I wanted to accomplish instead of getting out there and running down every ball and making jokes and laughing. That's how it used to be, how I used to play."

Roberts tried to convince Land that, regardless of what her record as a senior might be, she still could be valuable to the Illini.

"She helped me rearrange my goals," Land said. "She said, 'Why don't you try to have a good work ethic where you'll be a leader that way. It doesn't matter whether you win or lose. Just get out there and try to run down every ball so people will know you're a fighter.' "

Land bought into the advice, and not long after had proof it could pay dividends. When an Intercollegiate Tennis Association tournament came to Atkins Tennis Center last summer, Land decided to give it a shot and ended up advancing to the title match.

"That was the first time in a while that I won matches and felt good about myself," she said. "I think that started it all, rearranging my attitude. Before, I had so many fears of losing that it held me back from playing at my top game. Now, I just think about the ball and the point at the time."

What Roberts thinks about as she watches Land these days is how far her senior has come – on and off the court – in one season. A season that almost went on without her.

"I think what's so remarkable is the way that she's come back and fought back," Roberts said. "She just found the strength somewhere to put it back together and really has done an outstanding job her senior year."